"Oh God! I really thought seeing Blair might help him. He's worse than ever," Viki proclaimed. Her eyes filled with fear and pain for her brother.

"What's going on with him? Why does he suddenly believe Viki and I and even you are not real? Why is he so convinced that he was at Viki's cabin and she sent him away? Why was he saying it over and over again and why is Randy suddenly on his mind so much? Why is he so convinced that Starr will be hurt? Were those three, no what, four more alters who came out? What the hell is going on with him, Susannah?" A totally frazzled Sam asked question after question, without giving Susannah a chance to answer any of them.

"As I told you, Todd was having a psychotic episode, exactly what triggered it I'm not sure. Many of the fears Todd was expressing are fears he's had all along, they've just gotten tangled into other things in his mind."

"It stems from my pretending to be his mother doesn't it? That was the last thing he would have remembered before he came back today." Viki could not forgive herself.

"You don't know that. It may have nothing to do with that, Viki," Sam tried reason with Viki before Susannah had a chance to respond.

"Susannah, you do believe that is the reason don't you?" Viki insisted. She looked helplessly at Susannah.

"Todd was confusing many issues that were traumatic for him with his hallucinations. Confusing you with his mother is nothing new, neither is his fear that Starr will be hurt. What concerns me is that he is showing worsening signs of thought disorder and his cognitive reasoning is becoming impaired. I am also concerned because he was not able to tell if he was standing or sitting. His perception is off. He may also have been having hallucinations of sight and touch."

"Do you mean when he appeared to be stroking something in the air?" Viki pointed out.

"Yes, he may have been seeing something and feeling it in front of him. There is a possibility that the voice he heard was Saber's. He may have been telling Todd that you and Sam and I weren't real, or Todd may have been hallucinating a different voice. I'm afraid Todd is presenting with schizoid symptomatology. It may just be an aberration. If it continues I'd like to try some Zyprexa with him. It's the brand name for Olanzapine. It's one of the newer atypical antipsychotics. Its side effects are not as severe or dangerous as some of the older ones. It may also be of some benefit with the switching."

"What about what Blair said about her mother. What about those side effects?" Viki asked, anxiously.

"Those side effects can be brought about by all antipsychotics. The chances are greater with the older ones. Todd would have to be very carefully monitored."

For what? What are the dangers of this medication?" Sam inquired nervously.

"Why don't we wait and see if giving him the medication becomes necessary? There's no point in you worrying about the dangers of a drug Todd may not have to take." Susannah did not want to frighten them unnecessarily.

"Susannah, I would really like to know now, even if there is a chance Todd may have to take it," Viki demanded.

"So would I," Sam chimed in.

"All right. Like with other antipsychotics we would have to be watching out for what we call EPS, Extrapyramidal Syndrome. It is really a whole host of things, like Parkinsonism and dystonic reactions, oculogyric crisis. These basically are generalized spasms, involuntary movements of various parts of the body. Most affected are usually the eyes, mouth and hands. The neck can become ridged. In conjunction with the Zyprexa Todd may need some Cogentin, the brand name for benztropine. It's an antiparkinsonian agent. Akathisia, a sense of restlessness and anxiety, is also a possibility. He might have to be given a separated medication to combat that. There are some things are not as likely to occur, but are much more dangerous when they do, things like Tardive Dyskinesia . . . "

"That is the one that causes muscle twitches and jerking motions, like some of those things that happened to Blair's mother," Sam interrupted.

"TD usually causes spasms to muscle groups of the face and mouth, and grimacing. Blair's mother could have also been experiencing some Parkinsonism symptoms, but yes, Tardive Dyskinesia can cause that. It is usually not reversible and usually doesn't show up for months or even years after taking antipsychotics. We would also have to look out for any signs of NMS, Neuroleptic Malignant Syndrome. That can cause extremely high fever, perfuse sweating, muscle rigidity, tachycardia, which is a very fast heart rate, cardiac dysrhythmias, elevated enzymes that can effect the muscles, including the heart and we would also have to watch out for renal failure. Unlike some of the other neuroleptics, which is another name for antipsychotics, neutropenia is not as much of a risk with Zy . . ."

"That's what causes white blood cells to decrease. I remember you mentioned that when we discussed antipsychotics before." Viki reminded Susannah as she interrupted this time.

"Yes, we don't see as much of that with Zyprexa," Susannah finished.

Sam thought of something else that frightened him. "Some of those things you mentioned, renal failure and heart rhythm disturbances, Todd has already had those things. Does that that put him more at risk?"

"He would have to be monitored more closely, yes. One other thing," Susannah continued, "There is no injectable form at this time. It would have to be given orally. He would either have to take it willingly, which is highly unlikely for any of the alters or Todd, or we would put it in his feeding tube. Stomach upset is another potential problem. So is increased postural hypotension and dizziness."

"Great! He already can't get up from the bed or a chair without his pressure dropping or feeling dizzy. Would this make it even worse?" Sam questioned bitterly.

"It has the potential to do that, yes. The drug also has the potential to increase appetite and weight, which of course in Todd's case would be a good thing. It may also cause somnolence, extreme sleepiness, but can also cause insomnia and increased anxiety."

"Dear Lord, Blair was right. I don't want Todd to have to take that drug. I don't know if the risks are worth it?" Viki stated tearfully.

"You don't have to decide now. We have to wait and see how Todd is when he wakes up. It may not even be Todd who wakes up."

"Susannah, that reminds me. Would all the alters experience the same effects from the Zyp . . . whatever it is?" Sam asked.

"Zyprexa. As with any medication Todd takes, the alters can each have their own reaction to it. There is no predicting. Look, why don't you both just put it out of your mind for now? Let's wait and see how he is when he wakes up." Susannah was trying to quiet their anxiety.

"I don't understand. Why would he suddenly become schizophrenic?" Viki inquired. She was getting more frightened for Todd by the minute.

"Todd had had some psychotic symptoms along with personality disorders all along, but not enough to make an actual diagnosis of schizophrenia or paranoia. Many times there is a co-occurring illness. Schizophrenia can often manifest itself with mood disorders, especially unipolar and bipolar ones. Todd is also severely depressed. He may be exhibiting depression with psychotic features. It is not that unusual."

"What about those new alters? He was switching so fast I could hardly keep track. I mean those were more alters weren't they?" Sam wasn't sure. His head was spinning.

"Yes, alters or fragments."

"They seemed . . . sicker, I guess is the word, than the other alters. One was only talking about fire and one only spoke in rhymes," Sam stated, nervously.

"Yes, and the other two also spoke about very specific things. Noise and something about 'mama's bed.' Remember? He was screaming something like, 'that's mama's bed.' The one who rhymed was getting so agitated. They did seem somehow sicker than the others," Viki agreed with Sam's evaluation.

"That is why I believe they may be fragments. They may not be complete personalities. They may have served a very specific purpose for Todd. I don't want to add to your worries, but what concerned me about these alters is that they appeared to have schizoid symptomatology too. There may be some connection to Todd's episode. We really won't know any more until Todd wakes up. He should be asleep for the night. Why don't you two go home or at least go get something to eat and some rest?" Susannah suggested.

"Maybe later," both Viki and Sam said at the same time. Sam and Viki headed back to Todd's room and Susannah went to her office. She needing time to think about what was going on with Todd. Right now she didn't have a clue and that frightened her.

Tea was sitting at her desk in her office in Angel Square. She was interviewing a new client. She often put in late hours. For one thing, most of her clients were working people who could not afford to take time away from their jobs to see a lawyer who only worked a nine to five schedule. For another thing, Tea was happy to have something to fill her evenings. Everything always seemed worse at night. Sometimes, Tea felt overwhelmed with loneliness. Many nights she would start thinking about Todd and cry herself to sleep.

Mrs. Hernandez was in the middle of telling Tea about a problem she was having a construction company that had done some work on her house when Blair burst into the office. "We have to talk. It's about Todd," Blair practically shouted. She startled both Tea and her client.

Tea felt her heart drop into her stomach. She knew it had to be something really bad if Blair was coming to see her. Tea realized she would not be able to concentrate on what her client was saying until she found out what Blair had to say. She asked Mrs. Hernandez if she would mind if she came to her house later that night to continue their meeting. She explained that her husband was ill and this woman had some information about him. Mrs. Hernandez graciously agreed.

"What's happened to Todd?" Tea asked the second Mrs. Hernandez left.

"Do you have any idea what kind of shape your husband is in?"

Tea did not miss the sarcastic tone Blair used when she said the word husband. "Blair, just tell me what has happened to him. Is it his heart?" Tea asked in terror.

"It's everything. Do you know that he fell?" Blair blurted out.

"No," Tea quietly admitted. She was angry that neither Sam nor Viki thought to tell her.

"He has a concussion, a sprained wrist and some stitches in his lip, but that is not the main reason I'm here. How can you leave him there, Mrs. Manning?" Blair emphasized, Mrs. Manning.

"What are you talking about? Todd has been in the hospital for months. He is far too ill to leave." Tea countered.

"You just take their word for that! When is the last time you saw him? Do you have any idea how he looks? Do you have any idea how out of touch with reality he is?"

"You saw him?" Tea was feeling horribly guilty for the jealousy she was feeling.

"Yes, I saw him. He asked for me." Blair wanted to make sure Tea knew that.

Tea felt like she had been kicked in the stomach. "What did he want?" Tea tried to keep her voice from showing her emotions.

"I am the mother of his child. If he becomes concerned about her I am the one he would want to see."

"Has something happened to Starr?" Tea probed anxiously.

Blair did notice Tea's concern about Starr and immediately let her know that Starr was fine. "Todd was having some kind of hallucination. He thought this voice he was hearing was going to hurt Starr."

"Todd is hearing voices?" Tea asked, her voice trembling.

"Yes, and he's delusional. He believes Viki and Sam and Doctor Hanen are not real, that these people are only pretending to be them. He thinks Viki hates him and that he was just at her mountain cabin. He believes she sent him away. He is confusing her with his mother. He is subconsciously remembering his father killing his dog and thinking that something was going to happen to Starr because he was bad. He wants me to sell The Sun and take the money and run off and hide star and his puppy away. He thinks the dog ran away and that he is in danger. He was also switching personalities left and right. He is still feeling guilty over what happened between him and that damn Marty Saybrooke. He is even feeling guilty over you," Blair added begrudgingly.

"Over me?" Tea asked.

"I'm glad to see that you have the decency to be surprised. I'm sure all those millions that Todd paid you more than made up for whatever it is he's feeling guilty about."

Tea did not want to get into it with Blair. She let it go and instead asked, "What did Doctor Hanen say about all this?"

"She said he was having a psychotic episode. Tea, don't they tell you anything? Todd is falling apart. He looks like death. He has lost so much weight and he is so pale and sickly looking that I hardly recognized him. He can't even stand by himself. He has hysterical blindness. They have to feed him through a tube and . . . "

"I know that he can't see and I know that he and most of the alters are too depressed to eat and that he has a feeding tube. I know he has lost a lot of weight and that he's anemic and he went into cardiac arrest last week. Tea interrupted Blair. I . . . I didn’t know he's become psychotic." Tea was so frightened for Todd and she hated that Blair, of all people, had to fill her in on his condition.

"Tea, they are killing Todd in that hospital. He hasn't gotten any better. In fact he is so much worse. How can you stand by and let them do that to him?"

"If he was in any danger Sam or Viki or Doctor Hanen would have let me know," Tea declared defensively.

"Would they? Open your eyes Tea! He's in danger right now. I don't know how much more his body can take. They are keeping him drugged most of the time and now they are thinking of giving him an antipsychotic. Do you know what that will do to him? I saw what it did to my mother. It almost destroyed her. Why don't you go see for yourself?"

"Todd doesn't want me to see him this way, for the same reason he doesn't want Starr to see him this way. Because he loves us." Tea could not help wanting to get back at Blair.

Not missing a beat, Blair said, "Until today Todd did not want to see me either. Yet when he became really frightened and needed someone he insisted they call me."

Tea tried not to let her hurt feelings show. "All right, Blair. What exactly is it you want me to?"

"I want you to get him the hell out of there."

"Even if I thought that was the right thing to do, which I don't, Viki is Todd's legal guardian. She makes all the decisions concerning his medical care."

"I know that, Tea! Legally you are still his wife and you are a lawyer, a lawyer who never lost a case, as you always pointed out to me when you stole my little girl. Why can't you take Viki to court and get custody of Todd the way you did Starr? The way I understand it, the court said he has to have therapy. They did not say he had to be hospitalized."

"Todd is in the hospital because he is so sick. It would put him in even more danger if he were home," Tea reasoned.

"You know Tea, it's not as if we are all without means. We could get Todd all the care he needs. We could hire an entire staff. The difference is they would take orders from us. We would have the control over what they do to Todd. Now he is at the mercy of what ever Doctor Hanen thinks is best. Viki and Sam seem to go along with whatever she suggests."

"That is because she is an excellent doctor and she cares very much about Todd. She would never do anything to hurt him," Tea believed every word she said.

"Look, I know she is a very good doctor and that she helped Viki. I know she cares about Todd, but what if she's wrong? What if what she is doing for him is not the best thing? Maybe there is some kind of treatment out there that she is not aware of? Maybe some kind of alternative medicine that she doesn't know about or doesn't believe in?"

"What are you suggesting? That we take Todd to a faith healer?"

Blair noticed the sarcasm. "No, Tea! I am just saying that there may be things out there that Doctor Hanen doesn't know about. She's a doctor, Tea, not God."

"Have you spoken with Sam and Viki about this?" Tea inquired.

"Briefly. They feel the hospital is the best place for him because of his physical illness as well has his mental ones."

"Well, Blair! I think they're right. What if he's home and goes into cardiac arrest again? What if he needs to be restrained?"

"You know that they do that to Todd, that they tie him down like an animal, and you agree with that!" Blair could not believe this.

"It's for his own good Blair. What are they supposed to do, let him hurt himself or someone else?"

"Hurt someone else? Wise up Chiquita. Todd can hardly sit up by himself. Starr is stronger than he is. Why don't you go see your husband? See what they've done to him. See his weak and broken body and then you tell me how much they're helping him."

As much as Tea hated to admit it, she knew that she should be taking more of a part in Todd's life, or at least in the decisions made about his care. She felt ashamed of the fact that she was glad that Viki was making those decisions. Tea did not want to be responsible for what they did to Todd. She did not trust herself to be strong enough to always do what is best for him. Like Blair, her first instinct might me to rescue him rather than let them help him. As much as she wanted to see him a part of her felt relief that he didn't want her near him. After what happened on his birthday, when she came to visit the alters and Todd came back and freaked out when he realized she was there, everyone thought it best she stay away. Tea missed Todd. She missed him more than she ever thought possible, but the Todd she missed was not this sick and helpless child. She missed the man she knew. Yes, he was always deeply troubled and damaged. He was sicker than she ever realized, but not like this. Tea did not want to see Todd this way. She also realized that she had to.

"Blair, I am not promising anything, but I will find out if I can see Todd or the alters. I will go talk to Doctor Hanen. I'll explain your concerns to her and to Viki and Sam. I do trust them and Doctor Hanen. Viki and Sam love Todd as if he were their son. They are not stupid or naive. If Todd weren’t getting the best of care they would be the first to take him out of there. I do agree that I should go see for myself."

"You do that Mrs. Manning. You go see your husband and then you tell me that the hospital is the best place for him." With that, Blair turned on her heels and left Tea's office.

Tea took her wallet out of her purse and once again looked at the well-worn picture of Todd that she carried. The edges were beginning to fray from all the times she took it out and held it. She started to tremble. Tea kissed the face in the picture and put her head down and wept like a baby.

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