This too went smoothly. Once the tube was checked for proper placement in the stomach Doctor Lee turned Timmy on his back and started to wake him up. Assuming it was still Timmy, she called out his name. "Timmy, Timmy, time to wake up now. Timmy." When he didn't respond to her she motioned for Kevin and Susannah to come over.

"Timmy, come on buddy. Wake up. You're frightening Mr. Panda and Mr. Rabbit. Come on Timmy," Kevin called to him.

Timmy's eyes slowly opened. He could hear and see Kevin but Kevin's face and voice were distorted. Everything seemed foreign and dark to him. He could make out the forms but everything was blurred and the voices, though familiar, seemed far away. He was afraid and called out for his mother. He loved Kevin and Susannah but Timmy was sick and afraid and wanted his mother. "Mommy, mommy," Timmy called out weakly.

"Mommy's not here now, sweetie," Susannah let him know. She took his hand and stroked his hair back. "Kevin is here and Sam and Viki are right outside," Susannah continued, trying to comfort him.

"I want mommy," Timmy wailed. He turned on his side curled into a little ball.

"Hey Timmy! I have a couple of your friends here. They've been waiting for you to wake up," Kevin walked over to Timmy and held up his stuffed animals.

Timmy stared at him. "No! You're not Kevin," Timmy cried. He didn't believe the distorted figure in front of him was Kevin.

Susannah took Kevin aside and explained to him that the anesthesia had not completely worn off and Timmy's vision would be distorted for a while. She also explained that things might not seem quite real and also a little scary to him right now.

"Timmy, I know I look a little funny to you right now. It really is me, Kevin. I'm right here with Mr. Rabbit and Mr. Panda."

Timmy looked at him again. His shape was beginning to take a little more form. "Kevin?"

Kevin took Timmy's hand. "It's me, buddy."

"My throat hurts," Timmy whimpered.

"Timmy, I know your throat hurts and it will feel better by tomorrow," Susannah assured him.

Kevin handed the stuffed animals to Timmy, who took them and cuddled them to him. Timmy looked up at Kevin. "Kevin, can you find my mommy. She's real far away so daddy can't hurt her. Maybe you can potect her like you potect Mr. Rabbit and Mr. Panda. I miss mommy so much."

There was nothing Kevin wouldn't do for Timmy if he could. Unfortunately Timmy was asking for the one thing Kevin couldn't do. Kevin looked at Susannah. He didn't know what to say.

"Sweetie, we're not sure where your mommy is. Kevin would have no way of being able to find her," Susannah gently informed him.

Timmy stayed quiet. Big tears splashed down his cheeks. Kevin carefully lifted him up and hugged him. Kevin whispered, "Timmy, I'm sorry. If I could get your mommy for you I would do it in a minute. I'm really sorry buddy."

"Mommy's safe right? Sam says she's safe." Timmy wanted assurance.

"Your mommy's very safe Timmy. I promise nothing can hurt her anymore."

"That's good cause I love Mommy so much. Timmy sighed and closed his eyes.

Kevin slowly lowered him back down on the table. He kissed Timmy's head and whispered, "You have a good sleep buddy."

Timmy stayed in recovery for ninety minutes. Susannah went out to let Viki and Sam know everything was fine and Timmy would be taken back to his room soon. He was still sleeping when they brought him back to his room.

"Does he know the feeding tube is in?" Sam asked.

"No, he wasn't aware of it. I will tell him about it when he is more alert. Timmy slept for another two hours. Sam was sitting next to Timmy's bed when he awoke. Timmy looked around. His vision had cleared and he realized he was in his own room.

"Hi pal. How are you feeling?"

"I dreamed I was in this other place. It was scary! There was strange doctors there. I think Kevin and Doctor Hanen was there too. I think."

They knew Timmy was confused. Susannah sat on the bed. "Timmy, you weren't dreaming, sweetie. We took you downstairs to have a feeding tube put in. Now you're back in your room and it's all over and you're safe."

Susannah lifted Timmy's hand. "Sweetie, I want you to feel the feeding tube so you won't be afraid if you find it's there later." Susannah took Timmy's fingers and brought them to his face and lightly brushed them against the tube.

Timmy became frightened and wanted to pull it out. "No! Timmy don't pull on it. That's why I let you feel it. See, it's been there all along and you didn't even know it was there. Timmy, I want you to just leave it alone. It's not hurting, is it?"

Timmy thought for a moment and then shook his head.

"Okay then sweetie. I don't want you to touch it anymore. Will you promise me that, hmmm?"

"Timmy held up his little finger. He intertwined it with Susannah's and said, "Pinkie promise, that's special."

Kevin smiled. He wasn't sure if Timmy remembered what happened before the procedure.

Timmy slept on and off for the rest of the day. Kevin didn't leave until the evening because every time Timmy woke up he called for him. Finally Viki insisted he go home to have dinner with Cassie. She reminded him that Susannah told them once Timmy had his evening meds he would sleep through the night anyway, and he did.

It was Thomas who woke up the next morning. Sam had stayed the night. He explained about the feeding tube to Thomas and got him to agree not to disturb it.

"I hate Todd's body. I'm gonna try real hard to push out my own body and not use Todd's," Thomas announced angrily.

Sam realized how frustrating it must be for him to believe he had a different, healthy, body and to be stuck in Todd's sick one.

"Can I go to the playroom?"

"Maybe later, bud. You have to wait for Doctor Hanen to come in and examine you to make sure it's okay for you to be out of bed."

"I never get to do what I want!" Thomas grumbled and turned over on his side turning his back to Sam. A few minutes later Susannah came in. She saw Thomas laying on his side with his arms folded across each other.

"Thomas is angry with me this morning because I told him he couldn't go to the playroom yet because he had to wait to be examined first," Sam said out loud to let Thomas know that he apprised Susannah of the situation.

"Honey, I think another patient is scheduled to be in the playroom until eleven o'clock anyway."

"Can I go ride my bicycle?"

"No honey, I'm afraid you can't do that either."

"Because of Todd's dumb old sick body. Right! I hate his body. It always gets broken and hurt. His arm got broken and it hurt him but it didn't hurt me and I still had to wear a cast for a long time. It's not fair!"

"Honey, I agree with you. It's not fair. I know it must be frustrating for you to have to use a body that's hurt or sick and it must be hard for you to have to help Todd all the time," Susannah reflected and empathized.

"I'm gonna go away with Mama and then I can do what I want."

"What things would you like to do if you were away with your mama?" Susannah asked.

Tom wouldn't respond. He turned away from Susannah too.

Thomas refused to look at or talk to Susannah all the while she examined him. He wouldn't answer any of her questions. Frank and Carl came in to help Thomas get washed and dressed.

"Thomas is out today and he's feeling very angry." Susannah wanted them to know what they would be dealing with.

"Thomas, would you like to tell us why you're so angry today? Carl asked.

Thomas folded his arms across his chest and refused to look at them or talk to them either.

"Thomas, you need to get out of bed and get washed up and dressed," Frank spoke firmly.

Thomas ignored him. "Thomas, I remember you like blue clothes. We can get those if you like," Frank said more gently.

"NO! I don't want to. I wanna go ride my BICYCLE!" Thomas yelled.

"Come on, pal," Sam coaxed. He put his hand on Thomas's shoulder.

"NO! GO AWAY! I HATE YOU!" Thomas screamed at a stunned Sam.

Susannah knew that Thomas was angry and acting out. Even so, she could see his words cut deep into Sam. None of the alters, or Todd for that matter, had ever said that to Sam before.

"Guys, let's let it go for now. Come back in a couple of hours." Susannah ordered.

"Sure," they agreed. Carl turned to Thomas.

"Okay Thomas, if you change your mind and you want to get cleaned up and dressed, just call us."

Thomas didn't answer.

Susannah walked over to Sam. "You know he didn't mean it, Sam," Susannah whispered.

"I know," Sam replied, feeling a little embarrassed that he was so easily hurt by a child's angry remark.

Susannah pulled up a chair next to Thomas' bed. "I'll bet it feels pretty bad to have someone tell you can't do any of the things you like to do, hmmmm."

Thomas ignored her.

Susannah tried a different approach. "Honey, can you tell us what we can do to try to help you not feel so angry?"

There was still no response from Thomas.

"Honey, the playroom will be available later. Do you think it might make you feel better if you passed the time by finding something in the toy box to play with or reading something or playing a game with us?"

Thomas picked up the pillow and pressed it on his ear. It was his message to Susannah that he was shutting her out.

Before Susannah had a chance to decide if she would just let him be angry for a while or try to talk to him some more, Viki came in. She could see by the expression on his face and the pillow pressed to the side of his head that it wasn't Timmy who was out.

"Thomas is not talking to us this morning. He's very angry," Susannah informed Viki.

"Thomas," Viki tried her luck as she walked over to him, "Is there anything I can do to help you?"

For a moment Thomas lay very still. Suddenly, he sat up and looked around and then looked around again. He slowly got out of bed and looked around the room. He just looked at some objects and lightly brushing his hands over others. He kept looking to the left and then to the right, as if he were looking at something or someone. He then saw Viki.

"You promised us you'd take us with you. You promised us. Why did you lie to us?" He looked Viki in the eye.

They knew this wasn't Thomas' voice.

"Don't make Mama feel bad! Don't make Mama feel bad!" yet another new voice spoke out.

"I don't care. If you send us back we'll run away again. Why can't we stay with you? We looked so hard for you, Mama. We heard the water and we found you. Why can't we stay with you?"

"It's cause he don't want us to. No one wants to be our daddy."

Then the first new voice started crying and begged, "Mama please! Don't be mad at us. Don't cry Mama we'll go back."

A confused Susannah asked, "Can you tell us who's out?"

Todd's body stood perfectly still as it's inhabitants suddenly becoming aware of Susannah and Sam. One of them answered, "That was Scared."

"Scared? Is that his name?"

He nodded and told Susannah, "He's my twin brother."

"And what's your name?" Susannah asked.

"Braver."

Scared and Braver, Susannah thought. "Can you tell me how you got your names?"

"Mama said to him, 'I know you're scared, Tom. I know you're always scared and I hate it. I'm sorry darling. I wish it didn't have to be like this. You have to go back with daddy.' Then she said, 'You can do it Tom. I can't take it anymore. You're braver than I am. Tom I know you're, braver. You're my brave boy. You can stand living with daddy. You have to go back. I can't keep you here. I want to more than anything, but I can't. You be my brave boy and go back. Don't do anything to make daddy punish us.' She sent us away. Todd walked all through the woods. He walked and walked until he found Mama. We talked to him. We told him about the water. Mama let us stay with her for six days. We thought she'd let us stay forever. I'm brave. I have to go back and protect Scared and Todd."

Susannah noticed that Braver repeated what their mother had told him verbatim. It was as if his mother's words were burned into his brain. Susannah knew that he most likely heard them over and over again. She also knew that in so many ways the damage Barbara Manning did to the child she loved was as great as the damage Peter Manning did to the child he hated.

"Where was it that Mama let you stay for six days?" Susannah pressed.

"The summer house. Mama's new husband had a summer house," Braver answered.

"Mama sent us away. We never saw her again. We made Mama mad and she sent us away," Scared cried.

"How old was Todd when you went to the summer house?" Susannah asked gently. She saw both boys were getting upset but only Scared was crying.

Ten," Braver answered.

"And how old are you?"

"Ten" Scared answered.

"Do you boys like to draw?" Susannah inquired.

"I like to. Scared draws better than me though."

"Can one of you or both of you draw a picture of yourselves for me?" Susannah requested.

"We can do it together. We usually do everything together," Braver informed Susannah.

Susannah borrowed some of Tom's sketch paper and crayons and placed them on the floor for them.

"We only need one piece of paper. We like to make one picture together," Braver explained.

"Is that all right with you too, Scared?" Susannah asked the quieter and meeker child.

"He don't like to talk too much. He don't want to get punished," Braver explained Scared's reluctance to talk.

The boys sat down and started to draw. They each took a crayon in their hand.

Sam watched in amazement as he saw "Todd" sitting there with a crayon in each hand. He was just as proficient drawing with his left hand as with his right.

This came as no surprise to Susannah and Viki. Susannah knew that very often DID patients were ambidextrous. Viki remembered that Tori was left handed, while she was not.

Braver and Scared worked as a team. Each coordinating his section of the drawing with the other. Handing each other the crayons and discussing it as they drew.

"No," Braver said, patiently. "You have to do the eyes. I can't do eyes as good as you."

When they were finished they showed the picture to Susannah, Viki and Sam. On the page were two small boys with strawberry blond hair, blue eyes and freckles. One of the boy's face was partially covered as he stood behind the other.

"Can you each put your names next to the picture of you, so we know who's who?" Susannah suggested.

Braver went first. He took a crayon in his right hand and wrote "Braver" next to the boy up front. Then Scared took a crayon in his left and put his name next to the little boy hiding behind.

They all noticed that each boy's handwriting was different from the other. Scared's was carefully written in a delicate script. Braver's was casually written in block letters.

"You can keep the picture," Scared offered shyly.

"Thank you," Susannah said, then added, "You boys draw very well. I'd be honored to have this picture. I'll hang it in my office. Is that okay?"

They both nodded.

Susannah could see Braver, whom she noticed stood straighter and seemed taller than Scared, whisper to him.

"Scared was afraid Daddy would see it. We have a whole bunch of pictures we drew for Mama. We have them hidden so daddy won't find them."

"We have to protect Mama," Scared admitted meekly.

"You won't show Daddy the picture?" Braver asked nervously.

"No, I won't. I promise," Susannah assured them.

Scared started shaking his head no. He whispered to Braver and Braver whispered back to him.

"He said, Mama promised to take us with her and she lied."

"I'll never lie to you," Susannah promised and then cautiously she asked, "Can you tell me what happened after you got home from the summer house?"

Both boys froze for a second when they heard Susannah's question. Then they held each other tightly. Sam and Viki stared in amazement as Todd stood there with is arms wrapped tightly around his torso. He began to pat his shoulders as Scared and Braver comforted each other.

"You can hide, Scared. I'll wait for Daddy. Don't be afraid. We'll run away again. Mama don't have to want us. We'll run away by ourselves. Don't cry, Scared." They realized that Braver was trying to take care of Scared.

Suddenly Todd's body stood up straight and tall. He knelt down and in yet another voice, a mature male voice, spoke to Braver and Scared. "You both can go inside now. Don't be afraid. I'll take care of everything." He then straightened up again. "Doctor Hanen, I realize you're trying to help, but I can't have you upsetting the children like that."

They all realized that this was an adult, seemingly, a male. "Have we met before?" Susannah asked.

"No. I prefer not to come out if I don't have to."

"Can you tell me your name?" Susannah pressed.

"Goodone. The children call me Papa."

Susannah sought more information. "Do you consider yourself to be the children's father?"

"I love them and I comfort them. I'm afraid though that once they are outside, I can't always protect them. That breaks my heart."

"Do you consider yourself to be their father?" Susannah repeated.

"I am as close to one as they have. At least one who loves them."

"Are you a father to all of them?" Susannah continued her questions.

"I believe there are some I don't know. I protect the children that are mine."

So far Goodone seemed very calm and in control. There was an air of kindness and gentleness that exuded from him. He seemed honest and straightforward. Susannah went on with her questions.

"Goodone, do you know Miss Perkins?"

"No. I have heard one of the children mention her."

"Do you know Timmy?"

"No."

"What about Andy, Tom and Thomas?"

"I know Andy and Thomas."

"I see that you know the twins." Susannah stated.

"The boys and the girl twins. I know both. Carol is closer to the girls. Girls need their mother."

Susannah's mind was spinning, along with Sam and Viki's. Within the space of no more than twenty minutes they just discovered the existence of six more alters residing in Todd's body and mind.

"How old are the girls?" Susannah asked.

"Ten, they were born on the same day as Braver and Scared, only much later in the day. I really need to be going now Doctor Hanen."

"Wait! Please, just a few more questions. All right?"

"All right," Goodone agreed.

"Do you know Todd?"

"Oh yes. Todd is in need of my comfort more than anyone. He allows me into his special place."

"Is that the place where Todd hides when he goes inside?" Susannah was hoping Goodone was her connection to Todd when he's inside. She didn't think Goodone was the gatekeeper. She did believe he was the primary internal self-helper.

"Doctor Hanen, how long do you think Todd and the children would trust me if I betrayed their secrets?"

"Goodone, you would not be betraying them. You would be helping them," Susannah explained.

"No, Doctor Hanen. Todd is terrified in your world. When he is with me he can rest and not be afraid. When he is out there he knows hate and pain. He knows how touch can hurt. Physical touch and emotional touch. With me there is no pain. There's no hate and no fear. Todd knows love, safety and peace. He is warm and happy. Why do you try to force him into your world?"

"Goodone, Todd belongs in my world. He is a human being and he belongs here. I am trying to make it safe for him. I am trying to show him that he is loved here. So many people love Todd very, very much. Todd's sister and Sam love him as if he were their child. They love him with all their heart. They would do anything for Todd. Todd's wife loves him. She would give anything to have him back in her life. Todd has a daughter who adores him and misses him very much. I would like you to help show Todd that it is safe to come out and that he doesn't have to hide to feel safe and loved."

"I'm sorry. I can't do that Doctor Hanen."

"Goodone, can you tell me why you can't?" Susannah pressed.

"Because I don't believe that Todd would be safe and happy for long in your world. As soon as he begins to feel safe or happy something hurts him. Todd once had six happy days in your world. He thought he had found safety. He believed it with all his heart, only to be crushed by it." Goodone shook his head as he spoke. "No, I am sorry. I must do what I feel is best for Todd and the children. I must try to keep Todd with me. He feels my arms around him and he knows he's safe. He sees my hands and he knows they will never hurt him. He hears my voice and he knows I will never make him hate himself. He sees my eyes and he knows I love him and I will never leave him."

Goodone was quiet for a few moments. They could see he was thinking over the things Susannah had said to him. He shook his head again. "No, Todd is safe and happy with me in his special hiding place. They all are happy with Carol and me. You really must accept that and stop trying to pull him into your world. You are only causing him to suffer more than he has."

"Goodone, can Todd see when he is with you?"

"Yes, he sees just fine. It is your world he wants to shut out. It is your world that makes him feel he doesn't deserve to see it. I have nothing against you, Doctor Hanen, or against any of you. I do realize that you care for Todd. However, my job is to protect him and the others from pain and suffering."

"Goodone, you can help everyone, especially Todd, by helping him to come out and not hide and by encouraging him to participate in therapy. You can also help Todd and everyone by helping the children to tell me what they know. You can also help Todd very much by helping him to get to know you and the others."

"No, Doctor Hanen that is not what is best for everyone. You cannot feel the terror Todd is in when he comes running inside. You could never imagine it. If you think about the one thing in your life that frightened you the most. Something that left you terrified. The one thing that even to this day you cannot think about without intense fear, you would have to multiply it by a thousand to even comes close what Todd feels after he's been out in your world. When Todd comes inside he is paralyzed with terror. It is the only respite from it that he has ever had. I will not allow you or anyone else to take that away from him. If you all care for him the way you say you do, I can't understand why you would want to?"

"Goodone, we want Todd to be able to have a normal, happy life. We want him to be able to be with his wife and daughter. We want him to be able to feel the love people have for him and to allow them to love him. We want Todd to not feel afraid and to feel good about himself and to know that he is worth caring about. We want him to realize how good and smart and special he is," Susannah hoped she was getting through to him.

"Ah, but you see Doctor, when Todd is with me he does know all that. It is only in your world that he does not. Now I really must be going. Todd needs to be woken up soon. He needs to feel my love."

"Goodone, do you know Saber?" Susannah asked quickly, before he went away.

Goodone's face turned cold and the mention of Saber. "Todd is safe from everyone when he is with me. When he is in my arms he is completely protected from everyone and everything. Now I am sorry, but no more questions. I have left Todd and my children alone for long enough. Doctor Hanen, Sam, Viki, I am happy to have gotten the chance to meet you."

"Where's Kevin?" Is he coming to see me?" They heard Timmy ask.

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