"Sam you really were kind of hard on her. Some people just can't face seeing their loved ones like that. Téa is really making an effort. Maybe Todd's instincts were right. He never wanted Téa to see him this way. Perhaps we should honor his wishes," Susannah suggested.

"Susannah, I just don't know what the right thing is anymore," Sam admitted. He sounded weary. Susannah understood how hard a family member's mental illness could be on the caregivers. She wished she had something more encouraging to say to Sam, but she knew the worst was yet to come.

Sam went to Susannah's office with her. He wanted to listen to the tape she made of Todd at the lodge, again.

"Susannah, what do you think about playing this for Bo? Viki could give you permission to allow that. I think he really has to hear this. I don't think my telling him what was said will have the same impact as hearing the both Todds and Pete tell what happened." Susannah thought about it for a few minutes.

"I think you're right. Bo needs to hear that tape. Make sure you take it to his office. I wouldn't want Nora to hear it. I can tell you now that even knowing what happened to Todd that night will not change the way she feels about him."

Sam hesitated before he continued. Then he decided to bring up something that had been on his mind. "Susannah, tell me if I'm out of line here, but I know Nora loves you and I'll wager to bet you love her. This distance between you has to be about more than Todd?"

"Nora can be very judgmental. She tends to hold onto things. I know what Todd did to her was horrible. I don't dispute that and I don't even ask her to forgive him, but she sees my treating him as a personal betrayal. Sam, you know Nora as well as I do. You know how she can be." Sam nodded.

"She just can't be fair and objective when it comes to Todd. So please, make sure she has absolutely nothing to do with this," Susannah insisted.

Susannah said she would make a copy of the tape right now and have it ready for Sam in an hour or so. Sam went back to see how Andy, if it was still Andy, was doing. He was still asleep. Connie had come on duty and she was with him. She said he hadn't stirred since she'd been there. Sam had dozed off in his chair. He did not hear Viki come into the room. Viki sat in a chair near Todd's bed. She looked at Sam. He's so good with all of them, she thought. If only Todd had been raised by someone like Sam his whole life would have been different.

Viki realized how much worse things would be for both Todd and her if Sam were not a part of their life now. Sam started to stretch. Viki walked behind his chair and kissed him on the head. He reached up and brought her face down to his so he could give her a "real kiss."

"Being a parent to so many kids is kind of tiring, isn't it?" Viki joked.

Sam laughed and replied, "Yeah, but think how I'll cash in come Father's Day." Viki put her hands around Sam and hugged him.

They heard Andy start to wake up. "Hi," Andy said, giving them a big smile.

"Hi, sweetheart, how are you feeling?" Viki asked. She walked over to him and kissed his forehead.

"Okay," Andy responded. He continued to smile until he moved around. He began to look frightened.

Viki became concerned. "Sweetheart, what's the matter?"

"Nothing," Andy whimpered. He was still clearly distressed. He sat very still, his head down.

"Hey pal, it's okay to tell us what's wrong," Sam encouraged him to speak. Tears started to roll down Andy's face.

Viki looked at Sam and said to Andy, "Sweetheart, you know there's nothing in the world you can't tell us."

"Daddy's gonna be so mad at me again. I'm gonna get punished real bad."

"Why do you think Daddy is going to punish you?" Viki pressed.

Andy hesitated for a minute and then, lowering his chin to his chest even further, he whispered, "Cause I wet the bed. Daddy gets real, real mad when I wet the bed. He gets his belt and his lighter."

Viki grasped onto Sam's hand so hard her nails cut into his palm. "What does Daddy do with the lighter?" she asked, her voice breaking.

"He burns my boy parts with it." Andy replied quietly and matter-of-factly. He said it as if it were a normal part of his daily regime. Thankfully he did not relive it. There were no flashbacks.

"Tonight I'm going to have to stand in the bathroom all night. Daddy won't let me go to bed. Sometimes mommy tries to get the sheets off the bed quick, before daddy sees. But he checks the bed and if it feels wet and mommy took the sheets off she gets hit too. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

"Oh, baby, it's all right. That just happens sometimes. It's nothing to be sorry or embarrassed about," Viki comforted him.

"Come on, pal. Why don't I help you get cleaned up and we'll get some fresh clothes on you?"

"If I leave before daddy punishes me, he'll get madder. I have to wait on the wet part of the bed," Andy protested and added, "Mommy says to pretend to be somewhere else and it won't hurt so much."

Sam squeezed his eyes shut for a few seconds. He wished for nothing more at that moment then to be able to put his hands around Peter's neck and choke the life out of him, as he had seen Pete try to do. Sam took a deep breath to calm himself before he spoke. Then he turned to Andy and once again assured this child.

"Andy, your daddy is not here. He is not coming here. He will never come near you again. I am not lying to you. I promise you. The things your daddy did to you will never happen again. Do you believe me?"

Andy looked at Sam and thought for a minute and then nodded. He turned to Viki and asked, "Are you still gonna let me live with you now?"

"Oh sweetheart, of course I still want you to live with me. Sam and I want you to be well enough to come home with us more than anything," Viki reassured him. She put her arms around his shoulders and hugged him to her. Sam went to the dresser and took out some clean pants and underwear for Andy. He held his hand out.

"Come on buddy. Let's get you into some dry clothes." Andy got out of bed and took Sam's hand and they went to get him cleaned up.

After taking Andy back to the playroom and leaving him with Alan, Viki and Sam went to Susannah's office to discuss what Andy had just told them. Susannah was not at all surprised to hear that some of the alters were bed-wetters. She explained that very often children who were sexually abused wet the bed long after an age they would be expected to stop. She was as horrified as they had been to hear Peter's method of punishment for the crime of wetting the bed. However she was not surprised. Susannah wondered aloud how much more Andy had to reveal. She always had a feeling he held many repressed memories. Susannah told Viki and Sam that she intended to start regular therapy sessions again tomorrow.

"Susannah, do you really feel, physically, Todd is strong enough, for that? I know, he is doing so much better since the pneumonia, but he still seems so fragile, physically."

Susannah heard the concern in Viki's voice. "Well, of course Todd is not in the shape he was in last summer, but if we wait for that, we could be waiting a very long time. I do feel he is strong enough to start therapy again or I would wait. The longer we wait, the worse it really is for him." Viki and Sam nodded in agreement.

Susannah's phone rang. It was Marcia. Alan was having a problem. It seems Todd came back. "He can't see and he's panicking." They rushed to the playroom.

"DON'T TOUCH ME! I DON'T WANT YOU TO TOUCH ME! WHERE'S SAM AND VIKI?" Todd was screaming. He clung to the wall he'd backed himself into.

"We're right here, pal. We're right here," Sam called out as he rushed over to over to Todd. Todd hands reached out, trying to find Sam. Sam took them in his own. Todd's hands were like ice. He seemed even paler than usual.

"Sam, Sam, Sam," Todd kept repeating. Sam hugged Todd to him. Okay Todd. Okay pal. It's all right. You're safe. We're all here with you." Susannah spoke calmly to him. Todd, no one's going to hurt you. It's all right. You need to calm down."

Todd moved his head around. He was disoriented and terrified. "Where am I?" Todd whispered.

"You're in the playroom. Alan is with you." Sam tried to orient him.

Todd looked confused and even more panicked. "Playroom? Alan?"

Sam realized that Todd was probably not familiar with either.

"Todd, you're in the hospital. We'll take you back to your room now, if you like?" Susannah offered soothingly.

"Is Viki here?" Todd's voice was still a whisper.

"I'm right here, Todd," Viki called to him.

Todd reached his hand out and Viki took it. "Viki, I still can't see," he whimpered. He was starting to calm down a little.

"I know, baby," Viki softly acknowledged.

"Todd, why don't you let us take you to your room now. You'll feel better being in familiar surroundings," Susannah suggested.

They got Todd settled in a chair in his room. He held on to Viki's hand the entire time. "I was in a car. I remember being in a car. It's Christmas. You said it was Christmas."

"Today is December twenty-eighth. It's a Monday. Todd, you were home for a few days that's why you were in a car. You were coming back to the hospital. It's still the same day, only now it's nearly five in the evening," Susannah informed him.

"I was home?" Todd's tone was a combination of disbelief and sadness.

"Sweetheart, you were home for four days," Viki answered cautiously.

Todd was quiet for a minute and then declared, "I must have done something bad. Is that why you sent me back here?"

"No Boomer, not at all. It was only a visit for the Holiday. Then you were supposed to come back here."

A tear trickled down Todd's left cheek and he admitted, "I don't remember any of it. I don't remember being there. Was Starr there?"

"No, Starr and Blair spent the holiday at Dorian's," Viki said.

Todd wondered if Téa was there, but he didn't ask. If she saw him like this he didn't want to know. "If I can leave here for the holiday, why can't I just leave for good?"

"Todd," Susannah said, taking his hand, "You were sick. You had pneumonia. We weren't having regular therapy sessions and I thought a few days at home would be all right, but you still need to be here. We have to get back to therapy now and this is the best place for you to be for the time being."

Todd looked dazed. They knew he was not quiet grasping the situation. "I'm afraid of being in the dark all the time," Todd confessed meekly. He almost sounded like Timmy.

"Oh, sweetheart I know you are," Viki acknowledged. She hugged him to her. Viki realized that Todd was allowing himself to he held and hugged now. Something he was always uncomfortable with before. Maybe it was because he was just so terrified that he needed to grab on to someone.

"Todd, other than not being able to see, is anything else bothering you, physically? Does anything hurt or feel funny?" Susannah questioned.

"I'm cold and it's hard to get a deep breath. I'm real tired. Just so tired."

"Why don't you let Sam help you into your PJs and you can get into bed. I'll get you some extra blankets. You can have your dinner in bed tonight. How does that sound?" Susannah asked.

Todd turned his nose up at the suggestion. "I'm not hungry. I don't want any dinner." They all looked at each other, each thinking the same thing. Here we go again.

"Boomer, you have to eat. You don't want to get sick again?"

Todd shrugged his shoulders. He clearly did not care if he got sick or not. They could see that Todd was starting to "go away inside his head."

"Come on Boomer," Sam said, slightly lifting him up from the chair. "Let's get those pajamas on you and get you into a warm bed."

Todd walked to the bathroom with Sam without resisting. They got Todd settled into the bed. He had not said anything since he had gotten up from the chair. His dinner arrived and Viki set up the tray so that he could eat it in bed. "Todd, would you like me to help you eat?" Viki offered. Todd shook his head. "All right then why don't you start before it gets cold. It's grilled cheese and french fries and there's chocolate milk and chocolate pudding."

Todd felt for the tray and when his hand found it he sent it flying off the table. "I DON'T WANT IT!" Todd shrieked and buried his head in the pillow and started to cry. Susannah had once again ordered arm's length two staff members near him at all times. Carl and Dave came rushing in when they heard the crash of the food tray.

"Todd," Susannah put her hand on his back, "Dave and Carl have to stay here with you. They won't bother you if you don't feel like talking. If you like, Sam, Viki and I can leave. Do you want us to leave?"

"Where's Sam?" Todd cried out. "I'm right here Todd," answered. Sam placed his hand on Todd's head. Todd reached up without raising his head from the pillow and took Sam's hand. He continued to cry until he fell asleep.

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