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Everyone was sad to see the holiday end. Susannah didn't know who was happier? Tom and Timmy being home, or Sam and Viki having them there? She knew it would not be easy to take him back to the hospital on Monday. Tom was out by himself Sunday night. He was sitting on his bed playing with one of his new video games. Viki was with him. When Sam came in to talk to him, Viki knew what he was there to say. She had been waiting for them to talk to him together.

"Hi coach!" Tom happily called out when he saw Sam come into the room. "You wanna play?"

"Not right now Boomer. We need to talk to you for a minute. Do you remember that tomorrow is Monday?"

Tom just stared at him. It was difficult for him to keep track of time. "Boomer, we're going back to the hospital tomorrow. Do you remember that?"

Tom looked first at Sam and then at Viki. His lower lip began to quiver. "Don't you and Viki want me here anymore?"

"Oh sweetheart, of course we do, you know that. Remember, when we first told you we were taking you home for the holiday, we told you that it was just for a few days and then you would go back to your room at the hospital," Viki reminded him.

Tom started to cry. "But I like it here. All my stuff is here. I like being with you and Coach. Why can't I stay? Was I bad? Did I make too much noise? I can be real quiet. I can sit forever and be really, really, quiet." Seeing his face and hearing his reaction, Viki and Sam felt like crying themselves. There was nothing in life either of them wanted more than bringing Todd home to stay.

"Boomer, you didn't make too much noise. Little boys shouldn't have to be quiet all the time. You need to go back to the hospital because you have to get well. You need to be there with Doctor Hanen. Besides, what about all your stuff that's still there. You have all kinds of games and books and puzzles in your room there and most of Timmy's stuffed animals are there. I'll bet all those animals miss you and Timmy. You have the playroom there and the art room. You like to go to those, don't you?" Tom nodded. Another couple of tears trickled down Tom's cheeks

"Sweetheart, you like to be where Doctor Hanen is don't you?" Viki tried. Tom nodded again.

"You know, I'll bet everyone there misses you so much that they're just sad all the time," Sam added. Tom shrugged his shoulders.

"Will you and Viki come with me?"

"Sure we will. Do you remember? We were there all the time," Sam reminded him. Tom thought for a minute and nodded again and wiped his cheeks with the palms of his hands.

"Will I ever get to come back here again?" He asked sadly.

Sam put his arm around Tom and hugged him tightly. He kissed the top of his head. "Oh Boomer, this is your home. Of course you'll come back. First you have to help Doctor Hanen make you well and help her make Todd well."

"I always help Todd. He don't have to get hurt. I help him," Tom started to cry again.

"We know you do, baby. We know you get hurt so Todd doesn't have to," Viki acknowledged.

Tom was still out the next morning. He didn't want to finish his breakfast and after some tries at coaxing him, they let it go to avoid upsetting him further. He was fairly calm about going back to the hospital. Still, they could tell he was sad. Viki noticed he left some of his new things on the dresser in his room.

"Don't you want to take these with you?" She reminded him.

"No, I want them to wait here for me." Viki realized it was his way keeping his place at home.

Viki was driving and Sam was sitting in the back with Tom. They were about a mile from the hospital when hearing Todd's panicked voice shocked them.

"Where am I? What's going on?" Todd cried out. He reached out, trying to feel where he was. "Am I in a car?" They heard the panic in Todd's tone. His breath was coming in short, frightened gasps.

Viki pulled the car to the curb. My God! Sam and Viki both thought. He still can't see.

"Todd," Sam began. He took Todd's trembling hands. "It's okay. You're in a car with Viki and I. We're taking you back to the hospital. It's okay, you're safe."

"Why am I in a car? How come I'm not in the hospital? Did I do something bad?" Todd's trembling increased.

"No, sweetheart, not at all," Viki assured him from the front seat, "You came home for the holiday and now it's time to go back to the hospital."

"Holiday?"

"Christmas," Viki informed him.

"It's Christmas! It's December! I CAN'T SEE!" Todd screamed. "I can't see," he repeated. He whispered it this time.

Todd's head lowered. "Do you remember me?"

Viki and Sam were surprised to hear Andy's voice. "Sure we remember you Andy," Sam answered.

Andy looked around. "This isn't the same place." "No, sweetheart, we're on our way back to the hospital," Viki informed him.

"That nice lady is there. Right?" Andy asked.

"Do you mean Doctor Hanen?" Sam assumed.

"Yeah, that was her," Andy confirmed and looked around. He noticed a Dairy Queen on the street. "Can I get ice cream?"

"Sure you can, sweetheart." Viki was happy he wanted to eat. Viki turned to Sam. "I'll go." She then turned to Andy. Andy, what flavor do you like?"

"The white one."

In a few minutes Viki was back with a vanilla ice cream cone. As Andy ate his ice cream he noticed some of it had dripped on his shirt. Sam could see he was starting to become upset.

"Andy, what's wrong? Is something bothering you?"

"Daddy's gonna get mad at me if he sees my shirt."

Sam turned Andy's face towards his. "Andy, your daddy is nowhere near here. He's very, very far away. He can't hurt you. Okay?"

Andy easily accepted this. Then he thought for a few seconds. "Are you gonna punish me for spilling the ice cream?"

"No, never," Sam promised. He put his arm around Andy's shoulder, "I will make sure that no one ever punishes or hurts any of you again, ever." Sam felt Andy's body stiffen to his touch. He quickly took his arm away. He remembered Andy's fear of being touched by a man.

Andy surprised Sam when he looked at him and stated, "I remember. I don't have to let you do stuff to me. You're not gonna punish me if I don't? Right?"

"Andy, I'll never touch you in any way you don't want me to," Sam swore.

"And you'll like me anyway?"

Andy's question broke Sam's heart. He looked into the child's eyes. "Andy, I love you. I will always love you. No matter what."

Andy looked at Sam and then put his head on Sam's shoulder and continued to eat his ice cream.

When they got back to the hospital Susannah was waiting for them. She was surprised to see Andy. "I remember you. You're Doctor Hanen. You're not my mommy. You did a good dinosaur voice," Andy smiled as he remembered.

Remembering that, Susannah smiled too and replied, "I remember you did a good dinosaur voice too." Andy giggled at that and then filled Susannah in. "Viki bought me ice cream and Sam said I didn't have to be punished cause I dripped it on my shirt."

"Did you used to get punished for that?" Susannah pressed.

Andy nodded. He asked, "Are my dinosaur toys still in my room? You said it was my room when I was here. Right?"

Susannah realized he seemed to remember every detail of their first encounter. "Yes, they're still there. Would you like to go to your room and play with them?"

Andy nodded and pointed to a room. "It's that one, right?"

"Yep, that's the one," Susannah confirmed and they all went inside Andy's room with him.

Andy immediately sat on the floor and started looking through the box the toys were in for his dinosaurs. Once he found them he happily started playing with them.

"Andy, would you mind if a very nice nurse named Terry came in and sat with you while I speak to Sam and Viki?" He shook his head and went back to his toys.

"When did he come back?" Susannah asked as soon as they were in the lounge.

"Susannah, on the way back to the hospital Todd came back for a few moments," Viki informed her. She saw that Susannah was very surprised by this. "

Susannah he was still blind," Viki continued, as tears welled up in her eyes. "He was so frightened, waking up like that, in a car, not being able to see. I told him it was late December and that really seemed to upset him. That's when Andy came back. My God Susannah! He's still blind. I don't know why but after everything he'd been through, the Baby coming out, the pneumonia, Tom and Timmy being reasonably happy for so long . . . I just assumed that when Todd came back he'd be able to see again."

Sam nodded his head in agreement. Susannah could see they were both upset that Todd was still blind. "Well, I would have hoped for that too." She paused and continued. "You have to remember, for Todd nothing has changed. I'm sure he has no memory of any of that. He still needs the blindness. He still needs to avoid even coming close to the memories that were revealed at the lodge. His need to punish himself is as strong as ever. As frightened as Todd is of being blind he needs it."

Susannah was about to broach the subject of Todd needing specialized therapy to help him function without his vision when they heard Andy yelling. "NO! YOU'RE LYING TO ME! DOCTOR HANEN SAID I COULD PLAY WITH THE TRAINS!"

"Andy," Terry was saying, "another patient is in the playroom now. Alan is with her. When they're finished in there then, maybe, you can go in and play with the trains."

"Everybody lies to me!" Andy cried out.

Before anyone could stop him, Andy crawled under the bed. "Andy, it's Doctor Hanen. Why are you hiding under the bed?"

"Everybody lies to me." Susannah could tell he was crying, despite the anger in his voice.

"Sweetheart, no one lied to you. I did say you could play with the trains but someone else is in there now. You just have to wait your turn, that's all."

"Is Viki still my sister?"

"Andy, of course, I'm still your sister," Viki confirmed, she was kneeling down beside the bed. "Come on out, sweetheart." Viki coaxed.

"I wanna stay here!" They could tell that Andy was still angry. Yet, they knew it was about more than not being able to play with the trains.

"Well, all right. You can stay there if you want to. I don't think it will be as much fun as coming out and playing with the toys," Susannah commented.

Susannah motioned for everyone to walk away from the bed. Susannah turned to Viki and Sam. I need to speak with both of you about the possibility of Todd receiving specialized therapy if his blindness continues. Why don't we go to my office." Viki looked toward the bed, unsure if they should leave. "He'll be all right," Susannah assured her.

"Why don't you go with Susannah and I'll stay here," Sam suggested. Viki nodded and left with Susannah.

Twenty minutes had gone by and Andy still had not come out from under the bed or made a sound. Sam was beginning to wonder if he had fallen asleep. When the lunch was delivered Sam peeked under the bed and saw that Andy was awake. He was staring off into space. Sam looked under the lid.

"Hey spaghetti! Tom loves spaghetti. What about you? Andy do you like it?"

Sam got no reply. "Looks like there's some Oreo's here too." Still nothing. Sam went to the door and asked Jeff if he could please bring the TV into Andy's room. Once it was set up, Sam turned on the television and flipped through the channels. He found what he was hoping for. The Flintstones was on.

Sam heard Andy stir under the bed. "Hey it looks like Dino is trying to tell Fred something. I guess Fred doesn't know how to talk to a dinosaur," Sam remarked.

Slowly, Andy slid out from under the bed. "I know how to talk to a dinosaur," he declared.

"I know you do. Do you know what Dino likes to eat?" Sam asked. Andy shook his head.

"Spaghetti and cookies!" Sam announced as he quickly lifted the lid off Andy's lunch.

"No he don't! Dinosaurs don't like that!" Andy giggled.

"Oh! Well, maybe I got it mixed up? Maybe it's little boys who like that," Sam corrected himself, feigning seriousness.

Andy giggled again, and announced, "I like spaghetti and cookies." Andy ate his lunch while watching the rest of the Flintstones.

Just as Andy was finishing his lunch, Viki and Susannah came back. Viki saw Andy's spaghetti sauce covered face. She smiled lovingly at Andy and went to get a washcloth. As she wiped Andy's mouth she commented, "Well, it looks like someone enjoyed his lunch."

"I did!" Andy exclaimed. His smile covered his face. "I can see that," Viki confirmed and kissed the top of his head. Viki was so happy to see the nearly empty plate in front of Andy.

"Andy, the play room is free now. You can go play with the trains if you like," Susannah informed him. "Yeah!" Andy jumped up excitedly, grabbed Sam's hand and asked, "Can you play too?"

"Sure," Sam agreed eagerly. He shrugged and grinned at Viki and Susannah as he let Andy pull him out the door.

"I think there is a lot more to Andy then what we've seen," Susannah commented after Sam and Andy had gone to the playroom. She continued. "He definitely has a better sense of reality then Tom and Timmy. He seems to be able to remember everything that is told to him and he has a good understanding of it."

"Yes, I noticed that," Viki remarked and told Susannah about Andy telling Sam he remembered he didn't have to let Sam "do stuff" to him.

"Andy has a lot of anger in him. Lucky he doesn't act out much or become aggressive and thank God he doesn't seem to have flashbacks. I do wonder about what Timmy told us," Susannah said.

"You mean about Peter trying to kill him?" Viki asked for clarification.

"Yeah," Susannah answered and added, "something made that child go away and hide for about twenty years. I need to find out what that was." They were both surprised to see Téa come into the room.

"Hi! I know this is Todd's first day back in the hospital. Is it all right to visit with him?"

"Sure it is. Andy is out right now. He's in the playroom with Sam. If you like, you can go there or wait for him here," Susannah answered.

Téa needed to think for a minute. "Now is Andy the one who just recently started coming out?" Téa was trying to remember everything Sam and Viki had told her about Todd.

"This is only the second time he's been out," Viki offered.

"Is there anything I should know, anything I shouldn't say in front of him?" Téa wanted to be very careful not to upset any of them.

"No, just be yourself. Andy is not as frightened a child as Timmy and he doesn't confuse as easily as Tom," Susannah explained.

Téa headed for the playroom. "She just stood in the doorway for a moment. She was enjoying the sight of Andy laughing and giggling as he and Sam played with the trains. Sam noticed her and waved her over.

"Which one of you is the engineer?" Téa asked, smiling. Andy looked up at her and asked.

"Is it your turn to play with the trains now?"

"No, I came here to visit you."

"You did?" Andy asked with a surprised look on his face, "How come?"

"Well, because you're my favorite person to see in the whole world."

With a big smile on his face Andy asked, "I am?"

"You absolutely are," Téa assured him and stroked his hair.

Andy continued to smile at her. "What's your name?"

For a moment Téa felt a twinge of panic when she realized he had no idea who she was. Then she reasoned that this alter would have no way of knowing her.

"My name is Téa Delgado."

"Do you know my mommy and daddy?"

"No, honey, I don't."

"Do you know Sam?" Tea looked at Sam. "Yes, I know Sam."

"I have a sister and she's gonna let me live with her forever and Sam's gonna live with us and I'm not gonna have to live with Mommy and Daddy anymore."

"I know! Your sister and Sam love you very much," Téa acknowledged.

"Do you like dinosaurs?" Andy asked Téa.

"Very much," Téa answered. She smiled at this adorable little boy.

"Sam bought me toy dinosaurs. You wanna see 'em?"

"Yeah, I would love to see them."

Andy stood up and took Téa's hand and turned to Sam. "Come on," Andy instructed him as he led Téa back to his room.

Viki had gone back to the paper. Téa had been there for about forty minutes when Susannah and Frank came in with a lab technician who was there to draw blood. Andy took one look at him and realized he was about to get stuck with a needle. He started to head back under the bed, but Sam caught him and stopped him just in time.

Sam was able to contain Andy's thin, weakened body. Susannah whispered to Frank to hold off helping Sam restrain Andy for now. She knew Andy hardly knew Frank and would become even more frightened if Frank were touching him.

"Come on Andy, it'll only hurt for a minute. They need to see how you're doing," Sam coaxed soothingly.

"Noooo! I don't wanna stuck," Andy cried.

"Andy, what if I do the test?" Susannah tried. She took the syringe from the tech.

"Nooooo! Let go of me!" Andy squealed. He tried to squirm away from Sam's tight grip.

Téa looked at the scene before her. She knew that just a few months ago, Sam never would have been able to restrain Todd that way. No one person would have. Todd would have been much to strong and powerful for that. This upset Téa very much.

Finally it became necessary for Frank to hold down Andy's legs while Sam held Andy's left arm firmly against Andy's torso by wrapping his arms around him. Susannah held out Andy's right arm and the technician was able to draw the blood. Andy was screeching and crying out the whole time.

Several minutes after the technician left, Andy started to calm down. Frank let go of his legs and Sam loosened his grip on him. Andy stayed in Sam's arms. He rested his head back against Sam's chest. He looked up at Sam and asked, "How come you let him hurt me? Was I bad? You said, you wouldn't let anyone hurt me. Did you lie to me? Are you gonna let Daddy hurt me too?" There was sadness in Andy's voice, not anger.

"Andy, I will never, ever, ever let your daddy hurt you again. I promised you that. Remember?"

"Everybody lies to me." Andy hung his head down. His tone showed anger now.

"Well, I'm not lying to you pal. Look at me," Sam lifted Andy's face up towards his by the chin. "I will never hurt you or let your daddy hurt you. Ever!"

"How come you let that man hurt me?" Andy asked. He looked at Sam, Susannah and Frank.

Susannah explained to Andy how important the blood test were and that he and Todd and everyone else could get very sick if they didn't know what was going on inside of them. Andy seemed to accept Susannah's explanation, but added, "I still don't like getting stuck!"

They could see that Andy was very tired. "Sweetheart, it's nap time," Susannah stated. "I want you to climb in your bed now and rest for a while."

Andy didn't argue with her. He was half-asleep by the time his head hit the pillow. He turned over on his side and noticed Téa standing near the wall. "How come you look sad?"

Téa was taken completely by surprise by his question. She hesitated for a few seconds and then responded. "Andy, I was sad because you had to get hurt."

"That's okay," Andy said, sleepily, "I have to get hurt a lot cause I'm a mistake." He then closed his eyes and went to sleep.

Sam and Susannah walked Téa outside. They could see the tears start in Téa's eyes.

"He'll be all right. He just hates shots. They all do," Susannah explained.

"It isn't just that. It's everything. I thought he was doing better, physically, I mean. Todd's body is so weak now. Sam never could have held him like that a few months ago and what he said about being a mistake . . . What a sad miserable life he's had. I don't know if I can stand this!"

"You don't know if you can stand this?" Sam repeated. He was furious. "Todd's the one who had to stand it. He and all those poor children."

"Sam, I didn't mean . . . I . . ." Téa sighed. "It's just so painful to see him like that. I know it has to be for you and Viki too."

"Not nearly as painful as it was for Todd to live it." Sam said, not giving her a break.

"Téa," Susannah began, "it is very painful to see them suffer now and to hear about all the suffering they went through. I have to warn you. Things are going to get worse before they get better. We don't know what Todd is going to have to face as far as the legal aspects of Michelle's death are concerned. Even that may pale in comparison to what it will take to get Todd to face everything Peter did to him and the fact that his mother let it happen. Téa, no one will blame you," Susannah looked at Sam as she said this, "if you can't watch it happen."

Téa looked down. She felt ashamed of herself and said, "I don't know. I just don't know. I want to help him. I just don't know if I'm strong enough. Sam, I'm sorry, but it the truth! I really thought I could do it and I intend to try. I do Sam. I'm not walking away from Todd. I just don't know how far I can go or how long I can watch him suffer. I know how terrible that sounds. Oh God, I'm being honest with you. I can promise you I will not let Todd suffer for one minute for what happened to Michelle. I will go to Chicago. I will never allow them to blame Todd for what happened. I'll find a way to prove Peter did this!"

"I know you will Téa. That's why I asked you to help," Sam admitted. He was feeling a little ashamed of his outburst.

Téa put her hand on Sam's arm and nodded her head and requested, "Sam, will you give him a kiss for me when he wakes up? Please tell whoever is out that I love them."

Sam gave Téa a hug. "I'm sure they all already know, but I will tell them anyway." Téa smiled sadly and left.

CONTINUED IN PART 40B

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