Kevin had been sitting with Timmy for about half and hour when Timmy started to wake up. Timmy looked at Kevin. Kevin could see fear in Timmy's eyes. "I'll get Viki for you."

Before he had a chance to leave the room Timmy spoke to him. "I remember you. I showed you my coloring book at that other place."

"At home," Kevin helped him out. Kevin felt odd referring to his home as Todd's home as well.

Timmy continued. "You let me play ball with you and that other man."

"Joey," Kevin prompted him. "I think so," Timmy answered, not really remembering Joey's name.

"Uh, listen," Kevin began. He walked closer to the bed. "I'm really sorry you got hit so hard with the ball. I thought you'd be able to catch it."

Timmy looked down and tears trickled out of his eyes. Kevin was not sure what to do. "Timmy, did I say something to upset you?"

"Daddy hates me cause I can't catch the ball good. He says I'm a clumsy bastard."

Timmy's words made tears come to Kevin's eyes. He remembered all the good times he had tossing a ball around first with Joe, and then with Clint. He knew neither of them would ever have said anything like that to him. He could not believe it, but in spite of himself, his heart was breaking for this little boy.

"Timmy," Kevin said, stroking his head, "you are not clumsy. You played very well. It was my fault. I threw the ball too hard. I wasn't being fair to you and you got hurt because of what I did and I'm very sorry."

Timmy looked up at Kevin. Timmy's huge sad eyes melted Kevin's heart. "That's okay, it don't hurt no more. Did I really play okay?" Timmy asked hopefully.

"Yes! Timmy do you know you are one of the best football players I've ever seen," Kevin was able to say honestly.

Timmy's great big smile made Kevin feel good in a way he couldn't understand. He just knew that he was happy to have given this child something to smile about.

"Do you like puzzles?" Timmy asked, looking directly into Kevin's eyes.

"Yes, I love puzzles."

"Do you wanna do one with me?" "Sure," Kevin answered.

Viki and Susannah were shocked to come into Todd's room and see Kevin sitting on the floor, putting a puzzle together with Timmy.

"Kevin does this real good. He says I play ball good too and that I'm not clumsy," Timmy announced enthusiastically.

Susannah knelt down next to Timmy. She stroked his cheek and agreed, "Of course you're not clumsy. Is that one of your new puzzles?"

Timmy nodded and informed them, "Kevin helped me put it together. He's my friend."

Kevin smiled a sheepish, slightly embarrassed smile. He was not embarrassed by what Timmy had just said, but by his previous attitude. He knew as certainly as his mother that he had been wrong. He knew Todd was truly ill and Timmy was as real "a child" as his son Duke.

They all headed for the day room. Timmy shocked Kevin by taking his hand on the way. Timmy's lunch was brought in. He showed no interest in the alphabet pasta that was on the plate.

"Hey, I used to love these when I was a kid," Kevin told Timmy. Viki smiled, remembering that, that was true. "Do you know what I use to do?" Timmy looked at Kevin and shook his head. "I used to spell out a word on the spoon and when I got it right I would eat the word." Looking at Viki, Kevin admitted, "I guess even then I needed to eat my words."

Viki smiled at her son, knowing that was his way of saying he was wrong about Todd.

"I know how to spell, mommy taught me. See!" Timmy fished out a B an O and a Y with his fingers and put them on the spoon. "See! BOY," Timmy said, proudly.

"That's very good!" Kevin praised. "Now you have to eat that before you put the next word on the spoon. Those are the rules of the alphabet pasta game."

Timmy ate the pasta on his spoon. "How do you spell Kevin?" Timmy fished out each letter as Kevin slowly told them to him. After he showed the completed name off to Kevin, Timmy ate those letters too.

"Ohhh, you swallowed me whole," Kevin joked, making Timmy giggle. Viki and Susannah watched with joy as, slowly and patiently, Kevin got Timmy to eat spoonful after spoonful of his lunch.

Timmy loved this new game. It took some time but Kevin played the game until all the pasta was gone. Viki came and got a wet washcloth and wiped Timmy's hands clean and then wiped his mouth and face. She kissed him on the forehead when she was done. She looked at Kevin and mouthed the words, "Thank you."

"Do you want to see the pictures I drawed?" Timmy asked Kevin.

"Sure I do," Kevin responded eagerly. Timmy stood up. Kevin noticed how hard it was for him and how weak Timmy was. He couldn't believe what had happened to Todd's body.

"They're over here," Timmy said. He walked over to the day room poster board.

Kevin helped Timmy with the IV pole. Kevin saw the names Timmy and Tom spelled out in colorful magnetic letters across different areas of the poster board

. "These are mine," Timmy pointed to the area under his name. "This one is me and Viki and Sam." Kevin was surprised to see a small boy with short dark hair and brown eyes in the picture. "This one is Doctor Hanen and this one is my mommy." Timmy rubbed his hand lovingly across the picture of his mother. "She's real far away and can't come to see me," Timmy said sadly.

"She's very pretty. You draw very well," Kevin's compliment was genuine.

Timmy got another big smile on his face, but it quickly turned to sadness. Timmy hung his head down. Kevin could see a tear slide down his cheek. "What's the matter?" Kevin asked. He put his hand on Timmy's shoulder.

"Daddy says I draw bad, that the picture I made is . . . mommy says I shouldn't say that word. Mommy put it on the refrigerator and forgot to take it down before daddy came home.

Timmy sat down cross-legged on the floor and put his hands in front of his face. He started crying even harder. Susannah was about to go to him when Kevin knelt down and stroked the back of Timmy's head and asked. "Did daddy get mad?"

"He crumbled up the picture and pushed it in mommy's mouth and then he hit her on the face. I'm always bad. I'm always getting mommy hurt," Timmy wept. His cries got even louder.

Kevin took Timmy in his arms. He was shocked at his own instincts to comfort this child. "Timmy, you are not bad. Your daddy is the one who did something bad. Your mommy knew that. She didn't blame you."

"Daddy will get mad at you if you say that." Timmy warned Kevin. Timmy's eyes were frightened.

Kevin tightened his hug. "Timmy, I'm not afraid of your daddy and I don't want you to be either. Hey, are we friends?" Timmy looked at Kevin and nodded.

"Well friends don't let other friends get hurt and I will never let your daddy hurt you again." Timmy looked over at the picture of his mother. "Do you think mommy will come to see me someday?" Kevin looked up at his mother and Susannah, not knowing how to answer that. Susannah was about to step in when Kevin found the words.

"Timmy, I don't know if your mommy can ever get back here, but I do know she loves you more than anything in the whole world. If she can't get back here, it is not because she doesn't want to. It's because she can't."

Timmy brightened up and told Kevin, "While I'm here I have two mommies. Viki and Doctor Hanen," he pointed to each of them. Kevin felt odd realizing that Timmy considered Viki to be his mother, rather than his sister, but he realized that Timmy certainly needed a mother and he couldn't ask for a better one than Viki.

Sam came into the room. When he saw Kevin crouched down next to Timmy he walked to where they were and put a protective hand on Timmy's shoulder. "Hey pal, how ya doin'?" Sam kissed the top of Timmy's head as he asked that.

Sam looked at Kevin and asked Timmy, "Is everything all right?"

"Kevin came to see me and he says I'm the best football player and that I'm not clumsy and that I draw real good and that mommy loves me and Kevin did a puzzle with me and showed me how to play with alphabet spaghetti and . . . oh yeah, he's my friend." Timmy said all of this without stopping to take a breath. Sam was happy to see Timmy so excited. Still, he wondered if Kevin was up to something.

"Well, it sounds like you had a busy day." Sam stroked Timmy's head. Sam turned to Kevin. "I'm surprised to see you here."

Standing up, Kevin replied, "I had to bring some papers by and I thought I'd say hello to my new buddy here." Timmy looked up at Kevin, adoringly, and gave him another big smile. Kevin returned Timmy's smile with one as big as Timmy's. Kevin realized it had quickly become impossible for him to resist this little boy.

"Well," Kevin said, "I have to be going. Got to get those papers back to the legal department."

Timmy looked up at Kevin, clearly disappointed that he was leaving. "Are you ever gonna come back again or are you going away forever?" Timmy's large eyes were filled with sadness.

Kneeling down again, Kevin assured him, "Hey, didn't I just say you were my new buddy. I have a lot more games to teach you."

Kevin's tone turned more serious. He stroked the back of Timmy's head. "I'll be back Timmy. I'm not leaving forever," Kevin promised.

Sam followed Kevin outside. "Kevin, can I speak with you for a minute?" Sam walked up to Kevin and stood about two inches away from him.

"Is it me, or is it really warm in there?" Kevin asked, wiping the perspiration off his brow with his handkerchief.

Ignoring his question, Sam said, "If you're playing some sort of cruel game or thinking about writing some kind of expose or trying to prove something to your mother about Todd, you can just forget it right now! That child in there thinks you really like him and he is already becoming attached to you. I won't let you hurt him."

Kevin understood why Sam would think that. Kevin looked Sam in the eye. "You might not believe this Sam, and I don't understand it myself, but I was not pretending to like Timmy. I really do. I probably would still hate Todd if he were here . . ." Kevin paused. He shook his head. He didn't understand his own emotions. "Sam, somehow . . . Sam, my heart breaks for that poor little boy in there. I am so sorry that I hurt him with the football. I honestly believed that was Todd, trying to pull one over on my mother."

"And now what? You suddenly believe that Todd is sick and that Timmy and the others are real?" Sam was suspicious. He wasn't sure he bought this about face.

Kevin thought for a minute and then answered, "Yeah, I guess that's what I'm saying. Sam, I know there are a lot of things about what happened to Todd that I don't know, but I do know enough from what Timmy said to realize that he was raised by a monster. A man who wasn't my biological father also raised me. I was lucky. Clint is the best father a kid could hope for. What if Grandpa Victor had given me to a man like Peter Manning? What if, instead of my mother, I was put in the home with a woman who would abandon me to someone like Peter? Would I have turned out any different from Todd? I like to think so, but who knows? My mother always tried to tell me that I had no idea what Todd had been through and I shouldn't judge him. I still don't really have an idea, but from what little I do know, I realize that I would not have wanted to be in Todd's place for anything in the world. I know that I would never again do anything to cause that sweet little boy in there anymore pain and I know, that for the first time, I can understand my mother's love for her brother."

Sam searched Kevin's face. He looked into his eyes. Kevin seemed to be saying what was in his heart. "Kevin, I believe you. Don't ever make me sorry for that. If you are pulling something you'll be breaking your mother's heart, and I will break your neck."

Kevin didn't get angry with Sam for saying this. "You love my mother don't you?"

"Yes, I do," Sam answered quickly and honestly.

"I'm glad you're there for her. I can see she needs you, Sam, and she loves you. She's been alone too long. She needs someone who can share her love and grief for Todd. Tell Timmy I'll be back to see him soon," Kevin said, and walked to the double doors, to be let out.

Timmy was out for the rest of the evening. He didn't do very well with his dinner, not even showing any interest in the chocolate pudding that was there for dessert. He seemed tired and cranky. He did not resist when Viki told him it was bedtime. It took a lot of coaxing to get him to finish the juice they brought him, with his nighttime meds in it. Viki felt his forehead. She was afraid he was getting sick again. It felt cool. Sam said he'd stay the night. Viki went home, but her mind was in that room with Timmy.

Timmy had been asleep for about four hours. Sam was watching Leno when he heard Todd's voice calling out and saw Todd sit up and reach out into the air to see if someone was around. Taking Todd's hands, Sam said, "It's me, Boomer. I'm right here."

"Sam?" Todd turned his head in Sam's direction. "It's always so dark and cold. It's like there are too many trees around and you can't see the sun anymore."

"Like being in the woods, Boomer?" Sam asked, cautiously.

Todd started to tremble. He wrapped his arms around himself and started to repeat. "It's cold. It's cold." Sam got another blanket and wrapped it around Todd's shoulders.

"Todd, is that better?" Todd pulled the blanket around himself even tighter and nodded.

"Viki went away," Todd stated flatly.

"Todd, she went home to get some sleep. She'll be back."

"I had a puppy."

"What Boomer?" Sam was caught off guard by what Todd said.

"I had a puppy," Todd repeated. "My mother gave him to me for my fifth birthday. His name was Randy. I had to keep him in the basement because my dad didn't like him to be in the rest of the house. He ran away. One day I went downstairs to feed him and he was gone and his stuff was gone. He ran away and never came back."

Tears started to flow down Todd's cheeks. "How do you know he ran away?" Sam pressed.

"Because he just wasn't there anymore. One day he was there and the next he was gone forever."

"Did your dad ever say anything to you about Randy?"

"No, he didn't like him anyway. He was probably glad he was gone, just like . . ."

"Just like what, pal?"

Todd started moving his hands in the air, as if he were trying to feel something. "I wanna go outside. It's summer, isn't it? I want to feel the sun," Todd said suddenly and started to get out of bed. Sam quickly blocked his way and gently pushed him back.

"Todd, it's late at night and the sun isn't out. It's the end of December. Remember Boomer, remember we told you."

"No! It's summer. I remember! You're confusing me. I want to go out." Todd stood up. "It's cold in here. It'll be warm outside. I can take Starr to the park. I can't see. What if I lose her?" Todd grabbed for Sam's hand. "Sam what if I lose Starr?"

Todd was starting to panic. He was becoming confused and agitated. Dave heard him from his post outside the door and rushed in. He called to Marcia before he came in and she alerted Carl and Connie.

"Hey buddy, it's Dave," He let Todd know who was there before he reached for Todd's arm. "You need to get back into bed, Todd. It's late and it's time to sleep." Dave's voice was gentle, but firm. Sam was still holding onto Todd's other arm.

"Todd, it's Connie. Dave and Sam are going to help you back to bed. You need to rest now, hon." Dave motioned to Sam. They gently started to guide Todd back towards the bed.

Being in the dark, Todd quickly became disoriented and could not tell what he was feeling. He felt someone pulling on him but it felt as if they were pulling him down. He started to pull away. Dave and Sam tightened their grip. The others moved closer to Todd in case they were needed.

"SAM! SAM!" Todd screeched.

"I'm right here Todd. I'm holding onto your right arm. I didn't go anywhere."

Todd was escalating quickly. "NO! LET GO OF ME! I HAVE TO GET OUT! IT'S TOO DARK IN HERE. I HAVE TO GET OUT!"

Todd's struggling increased. Carl whispered for Sam to step aside. He and Dave quickly got Todd the few more inches it took to get him to his bed. They got him into a physical restraint once he was in the bed.

"I HAVE TO FIND STARR. SHE RAN AWAY AND IT'S MY FAULT!" Todd shrieked and fought their hands. Connie ran to get the sedative Susannah left an order for, if it became necessary. She injected it into the IV that was already running into Todd. It worked quickly and Todd just wilted in their arms.

"Sam," Todd called out weakly. Todd's speech was slurred.

"I'm right here, Todd," Sam confirmed. He took Todd's hand.

"Will you find Starr and Randy for me? They ran away. They don't want to be with me anymore." Todd's voice was barely able to go above a whisper. His speech was starting to slur even more.

"Shhhh, it's all right Todd, shhhh. I'll find them for you. Just relax pal. Close your eyes and go to sleep." Todd's body relaxed and his grip on Sam's hand loosened. Connie took Todd's vital signs.

"He's all right," she reassured Sam and patted him on the arm.

"Sam, I'll sit with Todd," Dave offered, "Why don't you go to the lounge and get some rest? Todd should sleep through the night. I'll get you immediately if he wakes up." Sam hesitated, but then took Dave up on the offer.

Once Sam was alone in the lounge he sat in one of the armchairs and stretched his feet out in front of him. He put his head back and covered his eyes with his hands. He sat like that for a few minutes. He then thought about how dark it was with his hands over his eyes. He realized that for Todd, now, it was always this dark. He couldn't just take his hands away and make the light come back. Sam started to weep. First softly, then sobs loud and full of pain left his throat. The pain he felt for everything that happened to Todd and for what was still happening to him came flooding to the surface and Sam cried until there were no tears left.

Sam straightened up. Enough of that! he thought to himself. He knew he could not allow himself to fall apart now. He noticed a copy of the Banner that someone had left on a chair. He hadn't even realized that tomorrow would be New Year's Eve. His first with Viki. He know that neither of them felt like celebrating, but he wanted to do something to make the night special. He also realized that Todd's birthday was January second. He would talk to Susannah and find out if they should somehow mark this occasion. He also knew that was the day he and Tea decided to go to Bo.

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