"What do you mean the lights are on?" Todd reached up to feel his eyes. "My eyes are open. Why can't I see! Why is it dark! All I can see is black. WHY CAN'T I SEE!" Todd screamed. His breath came in short gasps.

*************************************************************************************************************

Susannah sat on the floor, holding on to Todd with all her strength. She knew if he tried to stand and walk on his own, he would hurt himself. Susannah didn't want to further panic him by calling for Carl and Connie. Todd could not see.

"Todd, l know how frightened you are right now. I want you to take a deep, slow breath. You need to calm down so I can try and find out why you can't see. I know it's hard, but you have to try to relax a little. You're not alone. I'm right here with you."

Todd could not stop trembling. Susannah tightened her grip on him. "I want Sam and Viki. Please! I want Sam and Viki!" he begged.

"I'll get Sam and Viki for you. They're right here in the hospital. First you have to calm down and let me help you to the couch. Just take some slow deep breaths. It will help you calm down."

Todd tried and slowly his breathing became more even and his trembling slowed down.

"Okay Todd, I'm going to help you to stand up." Once he was standing Susannah took his arm tenderly and spoke softly to him. "We're going to walk over to the couch now."

"No! I'll fall. I can't see," Todd cried out. His hands reached out to feel for something familiar to grab on to.

"Todd I'm right here, holding on to you. I won't let you trip or fall. I promise," Susannah took his outstretched hands and held on to them. Finally, Susannah got him to the couch and sat him down.

"There we go. Okay Todd, you're doing great. I'm going to go to the door and ask Connie and Carl to come in here, okay?"

Todd reached out wildly for Susannah. "No! Don't go! Don't leave me. I'm scared!" Susannah wanted a chance to explain what was going on to Carl and Connie out of Todd's earshot. She took Todd's hands in hers. They were as cold as ice.

"Todd, I'm only going as far as the door. You'll be able to hear me and know I'm still in the room. Once Connie and Carl are with you, I'm going to get my secretary to get Sam and Viki to come here and be with you. Is that okay?" Todd whimpered in fear, but then nodded.

Susannah quickly explained the situation to Connie and Carl. She sent her secretary to get Sam and Viki in person and tell them what had happened. Susannah quickly returned to Todd. Carl was holding his hand and Connie was rubbing his back. His trembling had increased considerably.

Susannah took Todd's other hand in hers. "Todd, I'm going to look into your eyes with a penlight. Now, you tell me if you see the light at all." Susannah shone the light in Todd's eyes. She noticed his pupils reacted normally to the light. "Do you see the light?"

"No," Todd whispered. His eyes filled with tears.

"That's okay, just relax. What about now?" Susannah did not turn the light on this time.

"No! Why can't I see it? Am I blind?" Todd asked. They all heard the panic in his voice.

Viki and Sam came rushing into the office. "What's wrong? What happened?" Sam asked.

"I can't see! Something's wrong with my eyes. I can't see! It's dark. Sam, make it go away. Make the dark go away!" Todd cried out, to them.

Sam and Viki exchanged looks with Susannah and then went to Todd. Viki sat next to him and put her arm around him. Sam crouched down in front of him.

"Okay, Boomer, take it easy. Tell us what happened."

"My eyes stopped working. All of a sudden I couldn't see. I thought the lights were off. I thought it was a trick. Are the lights really on? Viki, are the lights really on?"

"Yes sweetheart, the lights are on," Viki's voice broke as she answered him.

Viki was afraid Todd would feel her shaking so she let go of him. He reached out frantically.

"Viki! Viki! Don't go away. Viki!"

"I'm right here, baby. I didn't go anywhere." Viki put her arm around him again.

"Todd, we need to get you back to your room. Do you think you can walk there if we help you?" Susannah posed the question to him.

"I'll fall or bump into something."

"No, you won't Boomer. We won't let that happen to you."

"Todd, I can get a wheelchair for you if you don't want to walk," Susannah offered.

"No!" Todd seemed horrified and started to cry.

Viki took him in her arms and held him. "Sweetheart, I know how frightened you must be. It'll be all right. The doctors will find out what's wrong with you."

"I'm blind, Viki. I can't see anything. It's all black. I don't wanna be in the dark. I'm scared," Todd admitted. Not knowing what to say to comfort him, Viki just held him close.

With Sam on one side of him and Viki on the other, Todd made it back to his room. Susannah stopped at the nurses station and called for a neurological and ophthalmological consult. Sam and Viki had gotten Todd back into bed. He had not let go of Viki's hand since they were in Susannah's office.

"Todd, some doctors are coming to see you in a little while. They . . ."

"NO!" Todd cut Susannah off before she had a chance to finish. "I don't want to see any doctors!"

Todd started to get out of bed. Sam stopped him.

"Take it easy Boomer. You have to let these doctors look at you. They have to find out why you can't see."

"No! Please Sam, don't make me. I don't wanna to see them!" Todd whispered to Sam. Turning to Viki, Todd pleaded, "I want to go home. Please! Viki take me home. Please don't make me stay here anymore! Please!"

Viki felt as if her heart were breaking. She knew that Todd was in a panic and she tried her best to comfort him. "Todd, I promise I will take you home eventually. Baby, for now you have to stay here and let the doctors try to help you." It killed Viki to have to say that to him.

Todd was completely exhausted. He couldn't even sit up any more. He tried to stand one more time. This time when he felt Sam push him back toward the bed he just went with it and allowed himself to be tucked into the bed. In a few minutes he fell asleep. Connie and Carl sat with him while Viki and Sam stepped outside his room to talk to Susannah.

"My God! Susannah, is he blind?" Viki asked as tears trickled down her cheeks.

"What the hell happened to him?" Sam demanded to know, before Susannah even had a chance to answer Viki's question. Susannah could see that they were both at the edge and couldn't take much more.

"I don't know what's causing this right now. I've called in a neurologist and an ophthalmologist to look at Todd. They should be here very soon. I have no way of knowing what's wrong with him until they examine him. They will probably have to run some tests on him. I can only tell you that his pupils did react normally to light."

"Susannah, how can they? Todd said all he sees is black. He's in the dark," Viki declared.

"As I said, I have no way of knowing now, but my gut instinct is telling me that there is nothing physically wrong with Todd's eyes or brain. I think his blindness is psychological and not physiological."

They were shocked. "You mean you think he has hysterical blindness?" Sam asked.

"It's now called a conversion disorder, but yes, that is what I think."

Before they had a chance to ask anymore questions Doctor Anderson, the neurologist, came walking over to them. Susannah gave him a brief history and explained Todd's current condition. She also explained that examining him might not be the easiest thing to do. They all went back into Todd's room.

"Todd, wake up Boomer," Sam called. He tapped Todd's cheek lightly. Todd stirred and opened his eyes.

"Sam," Todd cried out. He reached out in the direction of Sam's voice, frantically. Apparently he still could not see.

"I'm right here Boomer," Sam took Todd's outstretched hands.

"Todd." Susannah's voice startled him. "It's okay, Todd, it's Doctor Hanen. There is a Doctor Anderson here to see you. He's a neurologist."

Doctor Anderson moved closer to Todd. "Hi, Todd. I need to examine you. I promise I won't do anything that hurts."

Just hearing the sound of the strange doctor's voice sent Todd into a panic. "No! I don't want you to come near me. Viki! Viki!" Todd cried out. He reached for Viki.

"I'm right here, baby, shhhh." Viki took his hand. "Viki, make him go away."

"Todd, sweetheart, you have to let Doctor Anderson examine you. He won't hurt you. We'll be right here with you."

"Todd, I promise, if I do anything you don't want me to, I'll stop. Son, I promise, I won't hurt you."

"Don't call me son! I hate that!" Todd spoke loudly.

"All right," Doctor Anderson promised, "I won't ever call you that again. Now, Todd, I want you to let us help you to sit up on the side of the bed. I don't want you to try to get off the bed. I just want you to sit with your legs dangling down. Okay?"

Todd held on to Sam and Viki for dear life. He kept shaking his head, refusing to cooperate. Sam and Viki whispered to him gently. They stroked his head and rubbed his back. Finally they managed to persuade him to allow the examination.

Sam helped Todd into the sitting position. Todd held onto Sam's hand. "Todd, I'm going to shine a light into your eyes. Just relax, this won't hurt." As with Susannah's exam, Todd's pupils reacted normally to the light but he could not see it. "Todd, I want you to squeeze my hand as hard as you can, with your right hand," Doctor Anderson instructed. He put his right hand into Todd's. He then did the same with Todd's left hand. "Very good, Todd! You're doing fine."

Doctor Anderson asked Todd to hold both his arms out straight in front of him and hold them still. He noted that Todd's arms both stayed level as he did this. He asked Todd to touch his finger to his nose and then to the hand Doctor Anderson was holding out. "Great job, Todd. Everything looks okay. We're almost through. How are you doing?"

"Okay," Todd muttered.

"Todd, you tell me if you feel anything," Doctor Anderson prompted. He lightly brushed a pin against the sole of Todd's right foot.

"It tickles."

"That's good. It's supposed to tickle," Doctor Anderson informed him and did the same to Todd's left sole.

"That tickles too," Todd confirmed.

"Do you feel it the exact same way on both feet?" Todd nodded.

"Okay Todd, do you think you could stand up for a minute?"

"I'll fall!" Todd protested. He started to sound frightened again.

"No, we won't let you fall. I promise," Doctor Anderson assured him. He then added, "I'm going to take your left arm and Sam will take your right arm and we'll help you up. Is that okay?" Todd thought for a few seconds and then nodded. Once he was standing Doctor Anderson asked him to walk a few steps forward, assuring him that they were standing right by him and would not let him fall.

"Well Todd, you did very well. I'm all finished and you can get back into bed now," Doctor Anderson informed him and motioned for Susannah, Sam and Viki to follow him outside.

"Todd, Carl is going to sit with you for a few minutes. Is that okay?" Susannah inquired.

"Where's Sam and Viki?" He whimpered.

"We're right here," Sam confirmed and Viki added,

"We'll be right back in just a few minutes."

"You're not gonna come back! You're gonna leave me here." Todd burst into tears.

"Why don't I stay with Todd and you can fill me in on what Anderson says," Sam whispered to Viki. "Okay Boomer, I'm gonna stay right here with you. Viki will be back in a few minutes." That seemed to calm Todd down and he laid back and closed his eyes.

"So far, all of Todd's reactions were completely normal given his condition and all the medication he's on," Doctor Anderson began once they were out in the hallway.

"Doctor, what do you mean given his condition?" Viki inquired nervously.

"Todd's reactions are slow. His movements are sluggish. He has been through a lot. He's weak. Doctor Hanen has informed me that Todd is severely depressed. He is also on an anxiolytic and an antidepressant and he was just heavily sedated. All of that would account for his slowed reactions," Doctor Anderson explained to Viki.

"Would any of that account for his loss of vision?" Viki asked.

"Physically, no. I saw nothing in the exam I just gave him that would account for his vision loss. I need to run some further tests, starting with a CT scan and an MRI."

"Todd, will not be able to tolerate either of those tests unless he is heavily sedated," Susannah informed Doctor Anderson.

"That's fine, I see no reason not to medicate him at this time. I'll let you know as soon as I have him scheduled," Doctor Anderson stated and headed for the nurses station to make arrangements for Todd's tests.

"Susannah, do you think something will turn up on those tests or do you still feel Todd is suffering from hysterical blindness?" Viki asked anxiously.

"Viki, I won't know until the tests rule out any organic defect, but yes, at this time I don't believe Todd's blindness is physiological.

CONTINUED IN PART 37B

This page hosted by Get your own FREE Home Page