PREVIOUSLY

"Where's Starr?"
"I convinced her she was tired and put her down for a nap." He could feel her grin against his chest. He swallowed. "I love you, Delgado," he said suddenly.
"Love you, too," she replied sleepily.
And in that moment, Todd knew that no force--earthly or not--could separate them. Not even death.

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Part 11: Vicissitudes

As the weeks progressed and his wife grew steadily worse, Todd drew on inner reserves of strength he didn't know he posessed. And when she became so weak she could no longer climb the stairs, Todd bought a new bed and carried the cradle downstairs and set both up in the living room so she wouldn't have to.
She lay in bed beside him and he remained awake, counting the minutes by each life-giving breath she took.
A piercing wail cut through the air as a five month old Noelle awoke. Todd moved to get up, but was stopped by Tea's firm hand on his arm.
"Don't," she said, "Let me."
He forced himself to lay still as he watched her stumble painfully out of bed--she'd refused any painkillers--and across the room to the cradle.
"Hush, now..." she cooed, grunting slightly as her trembling arms struggled to hold on to their precious load.
Noelle's cries faded to a plaintive whine and Tea slumped heavily into the rocking chair beside the cradle.
"Todd, I can't--"
"I got it," he said quickly, jumping out of the bed and into the kitchen for a bottle.
Tea's face was streaming with tears when he came back into the living room with the heated bottle.
"Tea, what's the problem?!" he cried, sticking the bottle into Noelle's mouth and wiping at Tea's tears with his thumb.
"I can't even feed my own child anymore," she sobbed. "When she cries all I can do is hold her! And I can barely even do that," she added miserably, watching Noelle drinking contentedly from her bottle.
"That's...it's more than enough, Delgado. More than enough.
I'm sure she's grateful, you know? She's lucky to have a mother like you."
Although he assured her with his words, in his heart he was grieving the loss of the strong, independent woman he loved. He knew without a doubt that he would love his wife no matter what happened, but for him, it was made all the worse with every passing day and every capability she lost.

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Noelle, tonight was a turning point in my life. When you were hungry and crying and all I could do to comfort you was to hold you, my heart broke. Your father had to heat your bottle and he had to hold it for me. My arms could barely support your weight.
It's been almost six months since you were born, and six months since the doctors told me that, short of a miracle, in as little as twelve weeks I would no longer be with you. But I'm holding on, love. I'm beating the odds and I'm holding on for you and your sister and your daddy.
I have little strength left, but enough love to last me an eternity. You've given me a precious gift, love. You've given me something I never thought I'd get back again, something that I thought was gone forever since the day my own mother left me. You've given me an everlasting bond between a mother and a daughter. Even after I'm gone you'll still know it and know me.
I love you, Noelle. I cherish the memories of the short time we spent together as mother and daughter. I'm sorry that I won't be there for those special moments that only a mother and daughter can share.
Make sure your father behaves himself, love, and remind him to eat with a fork. He tends to forget.
Love always and forever,
Mommy

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Starr's face was wet with tears as she hovered over Tea's bed.
Viki could barely contain her own.
"Bye, Tee. I love you."
Tea raised a weak arm to her face and removed her oxygen mask. "I love you too, Starr. You're...." she paused to take a breath, "the best six-going-on-seven year old a step-mother could ask for," she smiled.
"I'm seven now, Tee," Starr sobbed. "I'm seven." Starr wrapped her arms around Tea's neck and covered her face with kisses. "I love you," she cried, her tears flowing faster.
"Time to go, Starr," Viki said gently, a catch in her voice.
She held up Starr's little red back pack. "You're going to have a great sleepover with Jessica and Moose."
Starr grabbed hold of Tea's hand. "I don't want to leave yet!" she cried.
"Come on, Shorty," Todd said, tearing his daughter away from her step-mother. "You're gonna have a blast, I promise."
Starr cried as though her little heart were broken as Viki lead her out of the penthouse.
Tears leaked out of Tea's eyes and slid down the side of her face, soaking into the pillow beneath her head.
"Bring Noelle," she rasped.
Todd scooped his baby daughter out of her cradle and set her gently on the bed beside her mother.
"I love you," she tried to croon, but instead broke into a fit of wretched coughs that shook the bed. She pressed her cracked, dry lips to her infant's forehead and let out a loud, heart-wrenching sob.
"I'll....I'll never get to see.....her take her first steps. Or ride a bike. A two wheeler."
Tea struggled with the words. "She'd be good. A little athlete, just like I was. I was....looking forward to it. To being there."
"So was I," Todd whispered, his voice thin and shaky with emotion.
Todd took Noelle back to the cradle and came to sit beside his wife.
He did not cry.
She clutched the musical dome with the woman and the baby inside in one hand and Todd held her other.
Tea whispered something and Todd leaned closer to hear it.

"Never seen a sky so blue,
Never been happy with anyone
Like I am when I'm with you
Look at the sun shining up in the sky
I feel a little closer to.....heaven...."

She sang slowly and softly and in a low, stinging voice.
Todd reached behind her and lifted her into a sitting position so they were face to face.

"When I look into your eyes,"

He finished.
Tea closed her eyes and slept.

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Todd looked out the window at the sun just beginning to dip below the horizon.
He gathered his thin, frail wife into his arms, wrapped a blanket securely around her, and carried her to the balcony upstairs.
"What are you doing, Todd?" she gasped.
He didn't answer, instead thrusting open the fancy French doors and stepping out onto the balcony.
The entire town was below them, and Llantano Mountain beyond it.
His breath billowed like smoke in the cooler-than-usual May air.
Todd sank to the floor, placing her gently in his lap, holding her head up so she could see the sunset.
He didn't bother with the oxygen.
He knew she hated it.
"It's so....beautiful..." Tea croaked.
She craned her neck to look up at Todd. "Take care of...." she began.
"I will," he choked. "You know I will."
"I love you....." she sighed, reaching up and trailing her fingers from his jaw to his ear.
"I love you, Tea. Oh, God, don't leave me!"

Here is where the road divides,
Here is where we realize
The sculpting of the Father's great design.
Through time you've been a friend to me,
But time is now the enemy;
I wish we didn't have to say goodbye.

But I know the road He chose for me
Is not the road He chose for you,
So as we chase these dreams we're after....

Pray for me, and I'll pray for you,
Pray that we'll keep the common ground.
Pray for me, and I'll pray for you,
And one day love will bring us back around
Again.

Painted on our tapestry,
We see the way it has to be,Weaving through the laughter and the tears.
But love will be the tie that binds us
To the time we leave behind us;
Memories will be our souvenirs.

But I know that through it all,
The hardest part of love is letting go
But there's a greater love that holds us...

Pray for me, and I'll pray for you,
Pray that we'll keep the common ground.
Won't you pray for me, and I'll pray for you...
And one day love will bring us back around.
Oh, I know that love will bring us back around
Again.

Tea's back arched slightly. Todd, his tears flowing freely now, put his lips firmly on hers. He felt her gasp slightly and a small whoosh of air and, his mouth on hers, her last, soft, sighing breath belonged to him. Her head lolled into the crook of his arm and Todd's anguished cry echoed throughout the darkening town.

TO BE CONTINUED

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